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3 Ways to Build Trust In Your Relationship

There is no relationship if there is no trust between you and your partner. The reason is, trust is the foundation upon which a relationship stands.


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Joshua Idegbere

2 years ago | 3 min read

Hint: No trust = no relationship

Have the courage to put honesty ahead of your ego. It inspires trust in your relationship.| PEXEL

Trust is fundamental to a quality, long-lasting relationship.

There is no relationship if there is no trust between you and your partner. The reason is, trust is the foundation upon which a relationship stands.

If there is no trust, you really don't have a relationship.

That's how important trust is in a romantic relationship.

When you and your partner don't trust each other neither you nor your partner will be invested in the relationship enough to make the relationship work. And when that either of you will walk out of the relationship at any moment.

Is that the nature of the relationship you want to have?

I guess not.

That's not what a relationship is. At least, that's not the kind of relationship you want to be in.

You can see why it is important that you and your partner work to build trust in your relationship.

Towards that end, here are three simple but effective ways to help you with that relationship goal:

1. Be honest

And encourage your partner to do the same.

Lack of honesty breeds distrust and ruins the chance to build trust.

On the other hand, being honest with your partner encourages them to do the same. By doing so, you both are setting the stage to build trust between yourselves towards a sound relationship.

There was a certain lady that taught me how costly being dishonest could be.

She told me she was a medical student in a certain university in Nigeria; that her parents were customs officials, and that they flew her to my state for a brief vacation and exploration.

I later found out that it was all a lie.

Even when she apologized. I never could trust her again. Soon after, the relationship failed.

Honesty is priceless.

Be honest with your partner.

If you are 22, don't tell them you're 20; if your parents are not living together, don't tell your partner that they are; if you have the tendencies to do things they may not condole, sincerely open up to them so you can work things out together.

That's being honest.

You don't have to tell lies to make someone love you. They may never trust you when they find out you deceived them.

Next,

2. Admit your weakness

There is something unique about people who admit their weaknesses: they possess courageous honesty. That is, they are true even when it hurts their ego.

Let's say you tell someone about a personal weakness, for instance, that you're not academically sound or socially smart. If these people are the ones you would instinctively want to protect your ego, but still, you were honest with your weakness or shortcomings, you will win their heart in no cheap way.

For that single trait you just displayed, they will feel drawn to you, see you as non-egoistic, and perceive you as someone to be trusted.

You need that trait to build trust in your relationship.

Place honesty before your ego.

Many people lack the virtue of courageous honesty. They can't seem to have the power over their ego. And so tell lies or shield the trust in order to look good to their prospective partners.

You don't have to do that. It comes with complications that can ruin your relationship.

Instead, take the mask off. 
Be real with what and who you are.

If you're deficient in any area of life and you feel your partner should be aware, let them in. Tell them the truth. You may have them never be able to trust you when they find out themselves.

Have the courage to put honesty ahead of your ego. It inspires trust in your relationship.

Lastly,

3. Really care about your partner

Look for ways to be of usefulness to them. Identify a need in their lives you can meet and work towards it. Take the time to know their life's purpose and see if you can contribute in any way possible.

You can't hide it for long.

People can see through your intentions, especially as regards their wellbeing in your heart.

If you have someone's interest at heart, they will perceive it. If you don't, they will also perceive it and react accordingly.

People trust action. Not words.

It is not by telling someone you care about them. It is your action and attitude that tell whether or not you do.

Really care

To build trust with your partner, really look out for their success.

Sometimes, make compromises for them. Put your needs aside sometimes and come through for them. It shows them you care about them to an extent that you can inconvenience yourself for them.

If you come through for them this way, they will recognize it and it will earn you a special in their heart.

Final thoughts

You need to build trust in your relationship. Because the importance of building trust with your partner can never be overstated:

There is no relationship if trust is lacking.

But trust doesn't build itself; it is you and your partner's responsibility to build trust in your relationship.

Start with these three we have considered and build on them. Before you know it, you will take your relationship to another level.

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Joshua Idegbere

I am Joshua Idegbere and this is my column. Stories with actionable tips to help you make the most of your life, career and relationships. Welcome!


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