I am into astrology.

Almost 12 years ago, when Pluto (the planet of deep change and transformation) was transiting my native Neptune (the planet of spirituality, dreams, the unconsciousness) I did my first Vipassana retreat.

It was a 10-day all-silent retreat and I haven’t done any meditation prior to that. Now, in retrospect, I can say that it was one of the most transformative events in my life. That, and having children.

For ten days I sat, walked, and stood in silence breathing in and breathing out. I became aware that I was thinking, noticed that, and returned to breathing in, breathing out. Time went super slow and since it was a silent retreat it was just me, myself, and my chatty mind.

I struggled during the retreat. For the first time in my life, I was getting to know myself; I was becoming aware of my thoughts. And… they were just awful. I was saying such mean things to myself, bullying myself, and I haven’t even realized, until then, that I was doing it. I thought that was normal, that my thoughts were doing their thing and there was nothing I could do about it.

I have been meditating almost every single day since then. I have only skipped a handful of days. Also, I went back for another retreat.

Meditation has changed my life for the better.

I am not a perfect human being. I am not a guru. I am living a very ordinary life, taking my daughter to daycare every day, going to work, eating and sleeping. Struggling with this and that daily. Crying, laughing.

But through meditation and by reading endless books about spirituality and personal development I have found seven core beliefs that have improved my life significantly. I want to share them with you.

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1. Know and love yourself.

This is a continuous process. Get to know yourself, that beautiful person that is you. When you truly know yourself you are unstoppable. Sit and meditate. Every single day.

For five minutes? Sure, start with five minutes every single day. Maybe morning and evening? Get to know your thoughts. You will see that they are not always your best friend. Sit with them. Sit with your emotions. Feel them. Let them overwhelm you and knock you over.

They are just emotions; they will not hurt you. Learn to love yourself. Most of us did not learn to love ourselves and that is sad. But, no one had taught our parents so how could they teach us?

2. Resistance is the problem.

Your resistance to the world around you is what’s causing you pain. Nothing else. Remember that. The problems are here to challenge you but they are not the cause of your unhappiness and pain. Your resistance — your mind — is.

If you resist you will suffer. Accept instead. When things are not going your way, remind yourself that you are not getting rejected, you are guided away from what is not your path.

3. Everyone is doing the best they can.

And so are you. Not many people are intentionally mean or hurtful. Their actions are products of their thoughts, their past conditioning. Our actions don’t define us. Circumstances we cannot control define our actions.

You can not tell a hungry child not to steal. Nor can you judge an abused and unloved person if they hurt. That is what they have learned. Do not judge them. Stay away if they hurt you but don’t cause more harm.

4. Trust that everything is okay.

You are a soul having a human experience. You choose this life, you choose your parents, your body, the country you live in. You choose all of that because you wanted to learn and grow.

Were your parents less than perfect? Yeah, you choose them. So did I. I chose them because I needed them to learn what I was supposed to learn. I choose my life and you choose yours. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and ask yourself why. Why? What did you want to learn by living your life? There is always something to learn. There is always something good.

5. There is enough; there is abundance.

Sometimes it is easy to feel jealous if someone else has something that you desire. A house. A desirable job. A romantic relationship with your Mr./Mrs. Right? But, if you are not with her/him then the universe has someone better for you.

Next time you feel jealous remind yourself that there is enough for both of you. Trust that we all can live in abundance. Trust that the limitations are an illusion and having more on your plate does not mean that there is less on mine. We all want different things in life. Even if we wanted the same there is enough for all of us. The universe will provide.

6. Choose love over fear.

I constantly remind myself to choose love over fear. These are our two primary emotions. All other emotions are based in either love or fear.

When I move from making decisions from a place of fear to a place of love my life is brighter. I feel grounded and in line with something bigger than myself. Events unfold in unexpected and beneficial ways.

Make decisions based on love to yourself, love to your family and friends, the whole of humanity if you like. Before doing something, ask yourself if you doing this out of fear or out of love.

7. I am divine, and so are you

Last, and probably most important, we are divine. We are a part of the source, the universe, endless love, call it whatever you like. We are all. We are all divine and beautiful souls. You are a beautiful soul; you are pure love and light.

Don’t think less of yourself. Remind yourself that you of your beauty. This is only one lifetime, one moment, you are not it. You are so much more. You are limitless.

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If you want to start meditating I can recommend some nice apps. Headspace has a free 10-day intro that can get you started, while Buddhify is a nice app for guided meditations. I usually just use Insight Timer. It’s a free meditation app with both guided meditations and a timer.

Also, Anita Moorjani’s book Dying To Be Me; Journey of Souls by Michael Newton; and Proof of Heaven: A Neurosurgeon’s Journey into the Afterlife by Eben Alexander offer some great, inspirational, and easy-to-read books about spirituality.