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You Can't Love What You Can't See Afresh. You Can't Love What You Are Not Constantly Discovering Anew

Beautiful and wise words from Anthony De Mello. Join me while I explore his deep wisdom!


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Patrick van Raalten

2 years ago | 2 min read

These wise words come from "Stop Fixing Yourself: Wake Up, All Is Well" by Anthony De Mello. You can read more about this fascinating man and author on his website.

I think Anthony de Mello is conveying a profound thruth about what it takes to truly love someone or something. We have to have the courage to constantly let go of our images, ideas and thoughts about anything and anyone.

In this article I reflect on what the wise words of Anthony de Mello mean to me. Join me!

The known and the unknown

As soon as we act from the ‘known' perspective we are not really engaging the person or the activity from a new perspective. We tend tot hink that we know it all, that we know the other person or know how to do this or that. I think that most of the time we life from this known perspective. Don't get me wrong I am not saying that it is wrong to live this way. There are certainly moments we need our routinely ways of living. This is much more an invitation to open up to the unknown, which is always new.

Like a true artist one can go deeper and really let go of what we know. I think, only then, things get really interesting and much more authentic. As an artist myself I have to constanly let go of what I know. That is, I have to trust the creative process in the moment. Trust what comes to me and trust my idiosyncrasies. I mean my quirks, my odd ideas and inspiration.

And then, I suddenly create and I am moved by some unseen energy. It is somewhat like surfing a giant wave I guess. And that is not without its risks; sometimes I get crushed by a giant amount of water and have to come up again and ride that wave again.

So it is with my storytelling. Sponteneaous words come that I have to trust. I must have the courage not the doubt these words, not to doubt myself at all. When I stopt doubting I start to discover anew. A truly beautiful feeling.Constanly our life is calling us to meet everything anew, to see with new eyes. How beautiful is that?

Imagine the next time you see your intimate partner and discover them anew! How would that be? And how would it be when your partner looks at you as if they see you for the first time? How would that feel?

I have to admit that I really don not know much. And that is truly liberating. Because then I am empty to receive and to create anew.

So love has to do with seeing afresh and discovering anew. That means going beyond what we think we know. Living this way, our life itself becomes a constant creative process where nothing is set in stone and where we are constanly renewing ourselves. We are literally discovering ourselves anew.

Then we become love in motion.

So how would our world look when we start to see afresh and discover anew? How would you feel to live this way?


Thank you so much for taking the time to read my piece and following me! Much appreciated! I really hope my words resonate with you and you somehow get inspired form the energy they carry. I love to hear what you think and feel, so don't hesitate to comment.

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Patrick van Raalten

I live my life as a deep contemplation from which my writing and art appears. I use my words and art to slow down time and take you to a place where freedom dwells. Most of the time we live on the surface of our lives. What happens when you dive into the immense depths of your existence? Travel with me into uncharted territory and you will discover that you are complete as you are now! Embrace this and play! Feel free to follow and connect!


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